NCIS; Palmer, Tony, McGee, Ziva; Rated PG-13
"What are you two talking about over there?" Ziva asked, looking at Tony and Jimmy suspiciously.
"Guy talk. You wouldn't understand," Tony answered dismissively.
"Actually, Tony, she might--"
"Hey, I'm a guy," McGee interrupted.
"Feeling left out, are we, Tiny Tim?"
"Sorry, Tim," Palmer apologized. "It's just, I had a couple of guy questions."
"Again, I'm a guy," Tim pointed out.
"It's about s-e-x," Palmer spelled out in a loud whisper. "No offense, but if I want computer advice, I see you; if I want 'that' kind of advice, I see Tony."
Tony gave McGee a smug smile. "Why visit a Starbucks when you can travel to Italy and get the real thing?"
"I still don't see why you would be seeking sexual advice from him," Ziva said. "He's a player."
"Just because I have a healthy appreciation of women doesn't mean I'm a pig."
"I didn't call you a pig."
"You're out with a different woman every weekend."
"Excuse me," Palmer said, but everyone ignored him.
Tony laughed. "You say that like it's a bad thing. I'm out there experiencing life. At least I'm not holed up in my apartment with nothing but a box of wine and a typewriter."
"Hey!" McGee protested.
Palmer tried interrupting again. "Excuse me."
"Don't pick on McGee just because someone points out how alone you really are."
"Thanks, but I don't need you to defend me, Ziva."
Amidst the ensuing three-way argument, Palmer slipped silently away and got back in the elevator. He knew he should have stuck with his original plan and bought a book at Barnes and Noble.
Disclaimer: All characters are property of Donald P. Bellisario. No infringement intended.